The Warm-Up: It’s Frank Lampard day at Chelsea… also a game happened

It was an emotional evening for Frank Lampard, taking Frank Lampard’s Derby County to the club at which he spent 13 years as a player and became a legend, and at some points it felt like less of a game, more a small gathering to which Frank Lampard had invited 40,000 of his closest friends.

In the end the result was something of a side show. How many standing ovations did Frank Lampard receive while managing Frank Lampard’s Derby County? Lots, that’s how many. And that’s the real quiz. Both home and away fans sang his name, he looked a little choked up that so many people had come to see him – and him alone – and at points it felt like the football game was a side issue. At the end he milked the applause, going to each side of the ground at least once, bathing in the glow of adulation.

Frank Lampard’s Derby County have consistently been the most entertaining team in the Championship in the last few years, and they displayed why in this game, scoring Chelsea’s first two goals with slapstick own-goals, one from Fikayo Tomori who is technically a Chelsea player, on loan at Frank Lampard’s Derby County, which was confusing, only to come back and find the right net twice.

Cesc Fabregas got the winner in the end, knocking Frank Lampard’s Derby County out of the Carabao Cup. Oh, yeah: the final score was 3-2 to Chelsea. But surely nobody was there to actually watch the football, were they?

Warm balls, or just the luck of the draw? Either way, the big suits at the Carabao Cup will have been delighted when both Tottenham and Arsenal made it through to the quarter-finals and drew each other, spicing things up something frantic in a competition which, let’s be honest, does need a little spicing.

Arsenal made it through by squeaking past Perennial Crisis Club Blackpool, managing a 2-1 victory but making things much more complicated for themselves than they probably should have done. Goals from Stephan Lichtsteiner and Emile Smith Rowe gave them a 2-0 lead, but then after a fine performance French midfielder Matteo Guendouzi got himself sent off, making things just that little bit more awkward for the Gunners.

Tottenham made slightly shorter work of West Ham, winning at the London Stadium for the second time in a couple of weeks, a brace from Son Heung-min and a rare strike by Fernando Llorente – hey, remember that guy! – seeing them through.

Will either side care? They probably should. Apart from it now being both sides’ best chance of winning something this season, it’s also a distraction from other matters, like not having a stadium, or allowing one of your best players to probably leave on a free transfer in the most needless manner possible. Think of the Carabao Cup as light relief. A chuckle in an otherwise grim world.

We should probably get the most important bit out of the way first: a football manager being hit by a coin thrown from the stands is very much Not On, and you hope that those responsible are identified and invited never to return to Heart of Midlothian’s ground. However, you do sometimes wonder whether Neil Lennon primarily thinks of himself as a football manager or a wind-up merchant first.

In last night’s ever-spicy Edinburgh derby, Hearts thought they had scored a goal in the last minute, which would have given them a 1-0 lead over their rivals and almost certainly a victory, only for it to be disallowed. Hibs manager Lennon, naturally, enjoyed the moment, giving the celebrating Hearts fans the big one before he was struck… somewhere by an object, probably a coin, thrown from the stands.

Fortunately Lennon wasn’t badly hurt, but it’s interesting and dare we say notable how quickly he fell to the turf upon impact. It’s like he never stopped playing. “My jaw is throbbing,” he said afterwards. “I’m very, very angry. I’m fizzing about it. It’s disgraceful. I don’t blame the club – you can’t legislate for the hatred of some individuals or the badness. I would like to meet the individual who threw the coin at me some day because I am not happy about it at all.”

It’s deju vu all over again in Russia…

Chelsea’s women have been having problems scoring goals this season. For whatever reason their previously unstoppable attack has become extremely stoppable, so at times like this you need your star striker to step up and get scoring. Enter Fran Kirby, who bagged a hat-trick in their 6-0 (7-0 on aggregate) hammering of Fiorentina in the Champions League, putting them through to the quarter-finals.

Bad news for all those Manchester United fans who loved Rafael like an aggressive, curly haired son who they forgave for most things because “he just gets it”. For your boy supports Jair Bolsonaro, uber right-wing president of Brazil. No more heroes anymore.

On ESPN, Gab Marcotti looks at the task facing Real Madrid after the sacking of Julen Lopetegui.

No actual football here we’re afraid, but in many ways it’s something better: one for everyone who yearns for the days of Football Italia on Channel Four, it’s a selection of James Richardson’s supremely silly but absolutely wonderful sketches.

One last straggler of a Carabao Cup game, as Manchester City take on Fulham in what promises to be a fest of goals: from City that is, them having scored 27 and Fulham conceded 28 in their respective 10 league games. A 0-0 draw it is, then.