The Warm-Up: Unai Emery's job is pretty simple

Everton were by far the better side against Arsenal for the opening 50-odd minutes of their Premier League encounter on Sunday. And then Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang and Alexandre Lacazette happened. Bang. Three minutes, two goals and game over.

The Gunners went on to record their first clean sheet of the season; now, whether that was down to luck or judgement is open to debate.

However, there is no debate over their quality going forward. In Aubameyang and Lacazette, they have two of the league's best marksmen, who are provided ammunition by the best in the business, bar none. Mesut Ozil's gait might not be to the liking of some of (Brexit) Britain's football connoisseurs but his ability to dictate play is in no doubt. Arsenal can score with the best of them but, as it stands, can't defend for toffee despite their clean sheet against the Toffees.

Now, should they improve that rather important area of their game, then well, they all of a sudden become a force to be reckoned with.

Whisper it, but with Lucas Torreira starting games and Sokaratis looking a decent complementary piece to Laurent Koscielny (when he returns), the Gunners are not that far away from being fairly robust at the back.

In conclusion, if you're going to go, go big and go early: so with Torreira running things in midfield, Sokaratis and Koscielny sweeping up at the back and Auba, Ozil and Laca, otherwise known as AOL (a precursor to MSN, look it up youts) tearing it up up front, The Warm-Up is ready to declare your 2018-19 Premier League winners as Arsenal Football Club.

Well done.

The Warm-Up presents to you the 2018 #CrusherMason rumble winner: Grant Holt.

Holt had a decent-enough career. He scored 192 goals in 580 games, and 26 of those goals came in 86 Premier League games.

However, Saturday night’s events may just top the lot: the now 37-year-old emerged the victor in a Royal Rumble at a wrestling event in Norfolk. Evidence of which can be seen below.

He may have been dressed in civvies but he is a legit wrestler, and despite taking a coaching role at Norwich in their academy, Holt, or Big Holty as he is now called at The Warm-Up, is serious about it all.

Fair enough..

Stoke City cast-off Eric Maxim Choupo-Moting scored on his PSG debut on Sunday. No, dear reader, that is not a typo. Choupo-Moting, the guy who was relegated at Stoke, scored the third goal as PSG came from a goal down to beat Rennes 3-1 in Ligue 1 on Sunday.

The Cameroon international had the last two years of a three-year deal written off after a disastrous spell in the Potteries. However, it took the 29-year-old just three minutes to open his league account for the Paris club. Impressive stuff.

For context, had Choupo-Moting elected not to cancel said contract, he would have been losing 3-2 at home to Blackburn on Saturday evening. Decent choice.

Al-Faisaly and Ohod Club, take a bow for this completely transfixing, utterly incompetent bit of play in the Saudi Professional League.

Professional, indeed.

There are so many layers of beauty to this masterpiece that The Warm-Up spent the lion’s share of its Sunday watching this on loop.

Just magnificent.

Salah made this kid’s day. Top stuff.

You know what really gets The Warm-Up’s goat? The bashing of footballers for their apparent lack of fortitude in the face of limited to zero physicality. Look, the career of a footballer is limited and injury can derail a career in no time.

So if players feel – and they are best to gauge this – that the occasional over-exaggeration of a foul offers an extra layer of protection then The Warm-Up shall cast no stones – they’d only miss.

However, we will make an exception for Steven Berghuis because the below clip is an utter affront to decency. Ban him. Make him play prop in rugby. Let him feel the pain.

You’ve shamed yourself, your family and your club.

Great teams are often intrinsically linked to great, iconic moments. The below team were great and Tony Adams haring forward to seal the title against Everton was iconic.

The Warm-Up inexplicably has not been nominated in the FIFA Best Awards so will not being attending. However, we shall have coverage of the awards on the site. We will also have full coverage from the UCI World Championships.