The Warm-Up: The good, the bad and the ugly
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Updated 18/06/2020 at 08:04 GMT
Ben Snowball salutes the return of sweet, sweet football.
The Premier League's triumphant return (unless you're Hawk Eye or David Luiz)
Image credit: Getty Images
THURSDAY’S BIG STORIES
The good: Football is back!
Football is back… and it means even more now.
As soon as Aston Villa and Sheffield United sunk to the turf in unison, seeing out the opening 10 seconds of the Premier League’s return fixed in defiance, it was evident how powerful a simple tribute can be.
Over 100 days have passed since a ball was kicked competitively on these shores. In that time, the Covid-19 pandemic has exposed the fragility of everything we take for granted, while the Black Lives Matter has exposed sweeping racial discrimination ignored for years.
It’s why we cherished Aston Villa 0-0 Sheffield United. No, it wasn’t a classic. Yes, it was a bit weird having artificial sound. But it was football with a purpose – a chance to collectively acknowledge the pain from the last three months. For the first time in a lifetime, football is no longer guaranteed.
And don’t get us wrong, we aren’t content with a snooze fest. We were delighted to see Raheem Sterling finally score in 2020 in the later match, to see Kevin De Bruyne prove his brilliance extends to the strangest of settings, to see Sergio Aguero pursue (and fail) in his solo mission to get on the scoresheet with the game long wrapped up. But it was so much more than individual storylines.
For so long, Premier League players have seemed detached from society. But despite them being further away, banished to play among empty seats, their collective efforts over the past weeks and months have made them feel a lot closer to home.
The bad: Goal-line technology
The seven cameras located in the stands around the goal area were significantly occluded by the goalkeeper, defender, and goalpost. This level of occlusion has never been seen before in over 9,000 matches that the Hawk-Eye Goal Line Technology system has been in operation.
Thought humanity’s run at the top was coming to an end? That the time of machines was almost upon us? Think again.
While many wondered how the mere mortals of the Premier League would cope after 100 days of enforced rusting, no one bothered to check if the machinery had maintained its fitness over the break.
So when Orjan Nyland blissfully back-peddled into his own goal, treating the net as a personal hammock, we all glanced to Michael Oliver – or specifically, his wrist – and awaited the command. But nothing happened. Perhaps our gaze had deceived us? It had looked over the line, but who are we to question the technology?
Slowly, it dawned on everyone that what they had seen was precisely what everyone else had too. A mistake.
Fear not, humanity. We’re not done yet.
The ugly: David Luiz
Genuine headline from a rival website prior to kick-off: "Arsenal manager Mikel Arteta wants ‘key role model’ David Luiz to sign new contract"
We suspect this was not the leadership the Spaniard had in mind. Luiz looked set to be spared the tyranny of Manchester City’s attack after being named on the bench, only for Arsenal to fully Arsenal inside 20 minutes and lose two players to injury.
The Brazilian picked up where he left off, following up an inconsequential howler against Brentford with a very consequential howler against City. One assist, one penalty conceded, one red card – not bad for a player who only spent 25 minutes on the pitch.
He looked genuinely crushed by his mishap, so we’ll wrap up this section and simply wish him a happy retirement.
HEROES AND ZEROES
Heroes: All Premier League players, staff and officials
IN THE CHANNELS
We’re just here for the Michael Oliver watch bantz.
HAT-TIP
This is because far too often, BME parents are working the jobs that often go under-thanked and underpaid. It took a global pandemic for the world to sit up and notice the importance of these jobs and, crucially, its workers. There is no direct connection between the black woman being spat on in a train station and superstars like Raheem Sterling and Marcus Rashford, but there is a shared experience. They are raised by the Belly Mujingas of this world – black women working all hours to put food on the table, to give their children a better chance in the same country that restricts their own.
Jude Wanga joins the Eurosport ranks to deliver a fitting tribute to Marcus Rashford's political campaigning and explain how his battle is not just against poverty, but structural racism and classism too.
COMING UP
The Premier League takes a day off – the last for one a while – to allow Real Madrid and Valencia to take the limelight.
Tom Adams is in mourning over Arsenal Football Club and is only rated 50-50 to be here tomorrow
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