'How I am not going to cry?' - Serena Williams opens up on emotions ahead of US Open farewell
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Updated 24/08/2022 at 21:50 GMT
Serena Williams says she "never visioned" that she would end up with the success she has had during her career, but that she is looking forward to the "new territory" of focussing fully on her family and her business career. Williams said she wrote her farewell words - later published in Vogue magazine - while in Switzerland, with "tears streaming down" her face.
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Serena Williams says she had "tears streaming down" her face as she wrote her farewell letter to fans, and expects to feel similar emotions during the upcoming US Open - her probable final career tournament.
Williams revealed her decision to "evolve away" from tennis on August 9, citing a wish to grow her family and concentrate on her burgeoning business career.
As such, an appearance in New York will bring the curtain down on her illustrious career that has yielded 23 Grand Slam singles titles, and 50 more besides.
However, as she admitted while talking on the Archetypes podcast to Meghan Markle, the decision was one she agonised over.
Williams said: "It wasn't very easy. I was in Switzerland, I was just sitting in the hotel at the desk just typing and deleting and typing and thinking and then crying and tears streaming down my face as I'm writing these words and going back on these memories. It was really hard.
"I've struggled with it for a while. I was just saying to someone, 'I'm going to be crying and everything and so don't think I'm sad'. It's not sad tears.
"It's weird because I've been doing this since I can't remember and I'm 40 years old now. So my whole entire being and my whole entire life has been for one purpose.
"So to not do that anymore, it's exciting, right? I'm really looking forward to it. Honestly, I can't wait to wake up one day and literally never have to worry about performing on such a high level and competing. I've actually never felt that.
"I mean, I've had a baby and I stopped and I've had injuries but there was always somewhere in the back of my mind that it's still a possibility. So for it to just be completely gone is new territory for me.
"And I'm happy about it, but it's just also something that I've actually literally have never experienced in my life.
"I just wanted to just walk away quietly and that's how I've always seen my career, just like I was going to leave with no goodbyes.
"I've been trying to decide what to do and I've been like, in and out not really sure where to go and that's the worst place to be, is on the fence.
"So it's like, make a decision, either be in it or be out of it. And I was on the fence for a while because I love what I do.
"I've been doing this my entire existence, even before I was born it was what I was meant to do and what I was supposed to do and what was chosen for me. So it's hard."
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Williams was candid about how she is looking ahead to her final bow at Flushing Meadows, whilst retaining hope she can progress through the draw.
"I definitely will be very emotional," the 40-year-old said. "How am I not gonna cry?
"Maybe if I hopefully can get through a couple of matches, then maybe I'll feel better but I think initially it's going to be hard because every time I step out there, it's literally my last time.
"All the support that I've gotten over the years, I couldn't have ever dreamed of it, and to hear everyone's so happy and so intense.
"I'm just from Compton and I never visioned that this would be me. I was just the youngest of five in a two-bedroom home, so to have people really supporting has been the most amazing experience and the most amazing ride and and I am so grateful for every moment that everyone has been there for."
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