The Warm-Up: Arsenal are back, baby
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Updated 09/03/2018 at 08:41 GMT
It is with a heavy heart that we have to announce you have to stop laughing at Arsenal, at least temporarily, after they remembered how to win a football match.
Aaron Ramsey of Arsenal and team-mates acknowledge the fans after the UEFA Europa League Round of 16 match between AC Milan and Arsenal
Image credit: Getty Images
FRIDAY’S BIG HEADLINES
Arsenal win a game!
Those of us on high alert for the early warning signs of an imminent dystopian age where the machines rise up and enslave us all were given a jolt this week when Amazon’s Alexa devices started laughing creepily at random intervals all over the world. Was this weird phenomenon the first sign that the singularity had been reached? That robots had attained, and then rapidly improved upon, human intelligence?
No. The Warm-Up has been conducting some tests and can exclusively reveal that it was something rather more prosaic: Arsenal’s recent form had simply been so hilarious that even Amazon algorithms couldn’t help but p*** themselves.
Well, the creepy robot laughter will be silent now, because last night Arsenal actually won a football match and, perhaps more importantly, in the process of beating AC Milan 2-0 away from home in the first leg of their Europa League last-16 match, looked like they had grasped the basic fundamentals of things like defending and running.
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Esultanza Ramsey, Bonucci, Milan-Arsenal, Getty Images
Image credit: Getty Images
Just when their season seemed in danger of suffering one of those total implosions Arsenal specialise in - like a trademark England batting collapse from the 1990s - Arsene Wenger coaxed a performance out of his side in pursuit of the only trophy they can still win, and a first ever European title for the Frenchman. Goals from Henrikh Mkhitaryan and Aaron Ramsey, both assisted by Mesut Ozil, give Arsenal one foot in the quarter-finals.
Still, let’s not get carried away. Much had been made of Milan’s recent Renaissance under Gennaro Gattuso - who as the match progressed and his face grew redder looked increasingly like a Question Time guest who just couldn’t understand why Brexit was taking so long and we hadn’t told the EU to stuff it already - but they finished the match with Fabio Borini, Suso and Nikola Kalinic in their attack.
Still, the laughter has stopped. For a day or two at least.
“At some stage, you need to respond and respond together with a good performance. That’s what we did tonight,” said Wenger. “The result will lift the belief in the team again. When you lose three games in six days, it’s always very difficult. We want to keep our focus and finish the job next week. That’s what the target is.”
Europa League: Best of the rest
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Atletico Madrid's Spanish forward Diego Costa (R) celebrates with Atletico Madrid's Argentinian forward Angel Correa
Image credit: Getty Images
If Arsenal are to make a serious fist of winning the Europa League this season (Alexa, stop giggling) they could run into some serious competition. Atletico Madrid are the current favourites to lift the trophy and beat Lokomotiv Moscow 3-0 at home in their first leg last night, with Saul Niguez scoring a stunning opener.
Diego Costa and Koke were also on target for Diego Simeone’s men, who will take some stopping. Meanwhile Borussia Dortmund suffered a shock 2-1 home defeat to Red Bull Salzburg, for whom Valon Berisha scored twice; Lyon beat CSKA 1-0; and Marseille took a big step into the last eight with a 3-0 win over Athletic Bilbao.
Get your full results here.
Florence pays respects to Davide Astori
Following the tragic death of Fiorentina captain and Italy international Davide Astori, his funeral took place in Florence yesterday. Thousands of fans packed out the town centre as a day of mourning was declared in the city.
Gianluigi Buffon and Giorgio Chiellini were among the guests in attendance. "You were the son and the brother that everyone would like to have," Fiorentina's vice-captain Milan Badelj said. "Your parents didn't put a foot wrong with you, Davide."
IN OTHER NEWS
Arsenal might have reached basic levels of competency again but Danny Welbeck still managed to execute one of the worst ever shots in history last night.
And it might be a couple of days old, but Cristiano Jr banging in an acrobatic effort from a Lucas Vasquez cross is always worth seeing.
RETRO CORNER
It’s Manchester United v Liverpool in Saturday’s early kick-off and while recent iterations of this rivalry have been invariably disappointing, it has provided some decent moments. Notably, Dimitar Berbatov’s amazing finish in 2010, which was captured by possibly the only good ‘fan films goal’ video uploaded to YouTube.
HAT TIP
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Manchester United's English midfielder Scott McTominay (R) vies for the ball with Sevilla's French midfielder Steven N'Zonzi (L) during the UEFA Champions League round of 16 first leg football match Sevilla FC against Manchester United at the Ramon Sanche
Image credit: Getty Images
Mourinho has been keen to stress that McTominay will not play every game but there is a growing feeling among supporters that playing the youngster in a midfield three alongside Pogba and Nemanja Matic may well be the club's strongest starting line-up right now. The boy from the youth team helping to get the best from British football's record signing. For the coaches at Manchester United, that feels entirely appropriate. The history of the country's most successful club has always been marked by big-money signings. That is nothing new. But even more important at Old Trafford is the tradition of home-grown stars taking centre stage at the Theatre of Dreams. That scarlet thread of youth development.
Saturday's big derby match could be the biggest test so far for United's new prospect Scott McTominay, who earlier this week opted to represent Scotland over England. Over at Sky Sports, the ever excellent Adam Bate speaks to the coaches who have witnessed his rise through the ranks at Old Trafford, and explains why his emergence is in United's best traditions.
COMING UP
It’s the usual smattering of European matches as Mainz host Schalke at 7:30pm and Roma take on Torino at 7:45pm on BT Sport.
Adam Hurrey will be here on Monday to report on Arsenal's comforting return to domestic ineptitude.
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