Aaaaaaarrrrggghhhh! It is upon us! Happy holidays, football mubarak, chag sameakh and merry World Cup! After four long, lonesome years, now we are whole again. So what of Russia v Saudi Arabia? Well, he said, answering his own question, Russia are not very good. They haven't won in seven games and weren't great before that, so face a struggle to get out of this group, which has neither greatness nor drek. Saudi Arabia, meanwhile, have run both Germany and Italy close recently, and won't role over today. But the reality is that Russians and Saudis aside, no one really cares because what's to care about? The World Cup is here!

World Cup / Group Stage

Luzhniki Stadium / 14.06.2018

Russia

Completed

Saudi Arabia

Y. Gazinsky(12')
D. Cheryshev(43', 90+1')
A. Dzyuba(71')
A. Golovin(90+4')

Live

Live Updates

ByTom Adams

Updated 14/06/2018 at 16:59 GMT

15:16

And another...

15:16

A favourite Russia World Cup goal...

15:12

Elsewhere in Group A, Hector Cuper has said Mohamed Salah is almost certain to start Egypt's opener against Uruguay. Sergio Ramos' relief is palpable.

15:10

Eric Dier has had a buzz-cut for the occasion. He looks well scary now, I can tell you. Somewhere in Cheshire, Ander Herrera is trembling.

15:08

The panel - Neville G, Wright, Dixon, Bilic - prefer Rashford to Sterling in the England side. I'm inclined to agree, if Rashford is thought to be hot, given the creativity of Alli and Lingard in midfield, but I see both sides.

15:03

"He gets a lot of stick for a load of rubbish," says Ian Wright. Quite.

14:58

We're watching some VT about Raheem Sterling, who is sort of from my endz. His ability to perform amid the noise - and let's be real, racist noise - from the gutter press is remarkable.

14:51

Mark Clattenburg, then. Who doesn't need a three-piece syoot and kerchief to sit in an "analysis truck"? Yes, we're back talking about VAR. I cannot grasp why any adult wants the buzz of celebrating a goal ruined, and can't let a bad decision, in a game of football go once the game is over. Here's a piece sort of about that.

https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/sport/2017/02/modern-obsession-managers-and-fans-blaming-referees-ruining-football

14:48

The World Cup has been removed from a box. It is fit as.

14:46

They are 100 percent brown. I'm going to go out on a limb here: brown shoes are never, ever acceptable, in any context. Don't @ me.

14:44

14:43

14:39

Ryan Giggs is wearing a black blazer, a navy shirt and cream throuser with belt hook but no belt. It is a phenomenal quantity of noooooooo and we can't even see his shoes.

14:36

So, who's going to win it? The way I see it, the settled sides are Brazil, Germany and Belgium. Spain were there, but no longer, I don't trust Belgium to win a succession of big games, and Germany don't have a transcendental player. If France had a serious manager, I'd be going with them, but they don't have anything close, and for that reason, Lord Sugar, I am going with Brazil.

14:36

14:35

14:33

Gary Neville is pleased that Spain fired Lopategui; I'm not sure what the point of it was, and how it benefits the team, regardless of whether it makes the syoots feel powerful.

14:33

The coverage starts by referencing the political awfulness of dis ting, open a discussion about it the start talking about football.

14:32

Talking about the opening ceremony, Mark Pougatch literally just used the phrase "Our very own Robbie Williams". I for one feel extremely proud.

14:30

ITV's credits, then. They're going for Moscow State Circus theme, which will ring a bell with 1980s Blue Peter alumni. It wasn't great, I'm afraid. But Red Square looks amazing, just like Tetris.

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